When we recite the closing line of the Kaddish, “Oseh Shalom… He who makes peace above, may he may peace on us and all Israel….”, why do we take three steps backwards?
The answer emerges in understanding how we create peace and true love. Rabbi David Aaron teaches the fundamental difference between Falling in Love and Climbing in Love. We often think love is merging identities. “When I fall in love, I am not opening up a space to include you…nor do I allow you to develop a unique sense of who you are.” However, climbing in love occurs when I make room for another and understand, respond and respect you for how you are.
We step backwards before speaking of peace for only by making space for another to exist do we create the possibility for peace.
Food for thought – Can you think of a relationship in which you made space for your partner? What did you make space for? What flaws in your character does your partner or friends have to make space for?
Allow others their own space. Respect people for their unique identity. Love someone despite their imperfections.
Wishing you the strength to love and include others.
With blessings, Rabbi Daniel Cohen